I was born in Edison, New Jersey on June 26, 1980. Just a couple months short of being a Reagan baby. My dad calls me a peanut head. I take pride being born in in a Carter Presidency. This picture was taken of me when I was about three or four. I'm not sure. I didn't grow for many years. I was 3 feet tall all through elementary school. Four feet through middle school. Five feet in high school. And seven feet tall in college. When I graduate the doctors tell me I will tower over Shaq, Shawn Bradley, and Manute Bol. I may go pro this summer. My decision hasn't been made yet. So, stop bugging me.
A picture of my dawgs back in high school. From the left: Me, Rohit-Ro, Cherian-Cee-$, and Dave aka.Tinsley. Here's an interesting fact about the picture. It was taken by a girl who stalked Tinsley through the our entire senior year. The psycho chick was hot. I said some mean things to her that I regret. Anyway, Summer...if you read this, I'm sorry. Well, let me tell you what these fools are up to. Rohit goes to UF. Because of that growing apart thing, we aren't friends anymore. But occasionally, I will say wussup if I see him. Cherian is at the University of Illinois where he is majoring in Catholicism and Brewery. Another interesting fact. I went to Illinois for a year. Cherian was my drinking buddy. He keeps me up to date on this girl Sheetal who I was in love with. He told me she's been around quite a lot. I don't know what that quite means. Tinsley is aspiring to be the next White Spike Lee at FSU. He's going to direct the screenplay I write. Natalie Portman is going to star. Whatever happens to all of us, we had some good times. Yeah, I am a damn sentimentalist. Cheers to the Glory Days!
My friend Nancy's on the left. She's at Harvard. She's like smart and stuff. Anyway, the girl next to her is Natalie Portman. Seriously, it's her. Bad picture of her though. But, Natalie Portman is a goddess. Nancy and I talk often, but I'm banned from mentioning the name Natalie. If I do, Nancy doesn't talk to me for 30 days. My suspension has reached 150 days and counting. But Nancy and I are in talks for a plea bargain.
Since the first picture of Natalie wasn't sufficient proof of her beauty, this one is. Please keep the salivating to a minimal.
A picture with me and the living god himself. It was taken in 1996 in the gymnasium of my high school. The Bulls won 72 games that year. MJ granted me a five minute interview. During the span of time, I managed to mumble one comprehensible question. Are you really Michael Jordan? MJ was getting ready to go golf and gamble, but he was cool enough to take a picture. Though, some fat guy, whom I didn't know, confiscated my camera and almost threw it to the ground. Actually, it was Jerry Krause. Before he smashed it, the team trainer showed him a Chicken sandwich. My camera was saved. I still hate the Bulls.
During the last days of our senior year Rohit stole his uncle's Benz and drove it to school. It was an ingenious plan and worked out perfectly. I forgot the model of the car. I think its a 420. My roommate Judson, who is a car expert, researched the type of model and said it could be either a 420 or even an E-class. It remains a mystery. I'm the one with my hands up, waving them up like you just don't care, singing oh yea yer. The other fools are C-Money, Ro, and Jimmy, whose life's dream was to go to UF. We are trying to be hard asses. Indeed, we were a mighty crew. Tony Soprano would be proud.
More Pictures and interesting stories to come.