So you're wondering where I'm from? It is not Florida. It is, well it is a long story. I shouldn't even be here right now, except that some very brilliant people made a very careless mistake. Here's the story:
I have this friend who is very smart. A genius in fact, and one day he walks up to me and says he knows a perfect job for me. When I asked him what it was he said he could not tell me yet, but it was good money and very easy. I started to think this was going to be illegal, but the next words out of his mouth were that, "Don't worry, this is perfectly safe and legal."
Well to make a long story short, I'll tell you what happened. My friend (whose name was Giles) brought me to an old warehouse on the outskirts of town. He then told me what was inside. "Inside these walls lies the first ever prototype of a temporal-displacement trajector, and we want you to be the first test subject," Giles said.
"A What!?" I replied.
"In layman's terms, a time machine, " Giles said.
Well I knew he was smart, but he built a time machine? Actually he and four other people had been working on this for months. It was privately funded and it operated on a very small budget. The government was not involved, heck they didn't even know about it. And I was going to be the first person in history to travel in time.
When I asked him why I was chosen, he gave me a few reasons. First of all, I was his friend. It couldn't be anyone who was already working on the project because they were all needed on the outside during the time jump. Secondly, he trusted me not to tell anyone about this, as this was still top secret. And lastly, He knew I could wait patiently. He didn't want the test subject to go meet himself in the past or pollute the timeline and create some kind of paradox or something like that. So, I was his choice.
"There are a few things you should know," Giles told me. "First, you can only travel backwards, not forward, in time. Secondly, this expirement may not work. We just don't know. And lastly, there is a chance you could die in the process."
Well I thought it over and decided I would do it. This was once chance I just couldn't pass up. He told me that I would go back 12 hours and wait in a room. In that room was a bunch of questions and forms that I was to fill out. Most of them were for me to describe the whole event. After I had filled them all out, I was to wait for Giles to come in and collect everything. He would enter the room right after the time jump, and in that room will be me, who has been waiting for the past 12 hours. Everything sounded good in theory.(But hey, what do I know?)
So on the day of the "temporal-transference", I was taken to the basement of the warehouse and had a seat in a metal chair. There were computers and large machines everywhere, I have no idea what any of them did.
So I'm sitting in the chair when a metal cylinder descends from the room and covers it. It is pitch black. I tell them everything is OK, then I hear a hissing noise and see a bright light and then... the next thing I know I'm sitting in the room with about 50 forms in front of me. Now it gets interesting.
I decided not to do the forms but instead go meet myself, the me from 12 hours ago. (I'm funny like that sometimes) I went to my house ready to see the look on the past me's face, but no one was home. "That's funny", I thought. I knew I was here 12 hours before the jump. I figured that my going back in time has somehow altered the timeline. Well I had enough, so I decided to call Giles. When I got a hold of him, he claimed that we have never met. My good friend said that! I then told him about the time machine and what happened. He said, "How do you know about that? It was supposed to be top secret!" When I told him I was the test subject for his experiment, he told me that they hadn't even come close to being ready to test it, let alone chosen any test subjects.
This was too wierd. I tried calling my parents, but they both claimed that they had no children and asked me to stop the prank calls. Now I was worried. Really worried.
So I decided the best thing I could do was go back to the warehouse, plead my case, and see what went wrong. In short, It appeared I was not taken back in time at all, but rather to another dimension. As brutally honest as ever, Giles told me plain and simple, "you're screwed."
And so I have made the best of things here in this strange new dimension. A year ago, when the machine in this dimension was operational, I tried going back home. It didn't work. I adjusted quite nicely and I am doing great.
Of course, when people ask where I'm originally from I obviously can't relate this story to them. Instead I have made up a cover story. If asked where I'm from, I will answer with Winter Park, Florida. But now you know the real truth.
That's my story and I'm sticking to it.